1 – Darn, that left-to-right tee ball

Nothing comes easier to me than turning a short dogleg left into a long, three-shot hole.

2 – Let me get closer

You can cease and desist with the range-finder until I’m within 150 yards.

3 – Brilliantly simple

The punchbowl green is the dress white shirt of golf. Timeless. Classic. Never goes out of style.

4 – Appreciation is not a four-letter word

If you have not yet hugged your superintendent or members of his or her staff, what are you waiting for? Temps to tap out at 125?

5 – Provide some dwelling

Bird houses, by the way, should be mandatory on all golf courses.

6 – You need conformity

If you agree with me that odd-numbered balls are played on odd-numbered holes and even-numbered balls are in play for even-numbered holes, then you demonstrate a great sense of order. Likely, you are also committed to having parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme properly aligned in the spice rack.

7 – Hey, the Beatles broke up and we survived

How and why this player-caddie thing got to be such a big deal baffles me.

8 – While we’re young

To the question, “Who’s away?” the answer is: “Whomever is ready.”

9 – LIV silly season

I’m guessing the Jason Kokrak-Kevin Na team will be getting an invite to try and defend their title at the Greg Norman’s QBE Shootout in December. Gee, wonder where the other 22 players will come from?