1 – Doctor’s orders

So the doctor said no heavy lifting for a few weeks. Thus was the decision made to take a wedge, my 6-iron, and 15 pounds worth of Scottish coins out of the bag. So now we’re lighter. Play on.

2 – You read correctly

That’s right, Scottish coins. Like, you’d rather I use those sewer cover-like poker chips that send shivers.

3 – Fire men

Rory McIlroy coming in hot from Augusta. Check. Justin Thomas still warm after that playoff win at the RBC Heritage. Check. Scottie Scheffler scalding following that CJ Cup performance? Check. Bryson DeChambeau riding high after closing out the LIV deal in South Korea? Check. Oh, yeah, there are some serious “trending” vibes that will pump plenty of juice into the upcoming PGA Championship (May 15-18).

4 – Get the mirrors out

The Kentucky Derby never fails to amaze. Seriously, who knew there were that may horrifically ugly hats in the world? I always laugh, but sometimes you want to just water these ridiculous things that appear to be growing out of a woman’s head.

5 – And another thing about hats

This has commanded a lot of my free time and long quiet walks in the woods, but it has been worth it because a heinous situation must end. Those big, bold ALL BLOCK LETTERS hats must be outlawed. Promptly.

6 – Thought everybody was happy

Just asking, but if LIV golf is such a blast and everyone is getting rich and sprayed with champagne, why on its website are all their players posing for head shots as if they’ve been sentenced to life in prison. Arms folded, total looks of disgust on their faces. Go check it out for yourself.

7 – Whether you want it or not, more data

Not sure the world needs another analytical quagmire to determine in which order professional golfers should be ranked, but Data Golf Rankings is on the landscape, trying to rival the Official World Golf Ranking. Fortunately, the majority of us will just continue to watch the biggest tournaments and watch who wins, which is the only ranking that counts.

8 – Just go from 9 to 10, no stopping

If I never get on the phone at the eighth hole to order food for the turn, I’ll consider my life a complete success.

9 – Knowing the game

Friends asked her what was bothering me. “Oh, he’s fine. He just kept coming over the top today.” They wanted to know if that was serious? “Gosh, no. He’s worse when he has a horrible day of casting.”

A work assignment at the PGA Championship is on deck, so "Power Fades" will not be published next week. We will return May 19.